The Return

Sometimes we go through tough times in a relationship made worse by bad things said between two people or not.  We don’t like our manager, for example.  Differences seem irreconcilable.  There’s little dialog.  Yet if reconciling feels right to us, it is possible to find a new beginning. In a working relationship we need to especially keep the … Read more

Standing Firm

When crossing a street we hold tightly to the small hands of our children. We steadfastly want to protect them and bolster their sense of security.   Holding tightly is analogous to “standing firm” in conversations.  Our children are precious.  So are you! Think about a time when you had to communicate something difficult or … Read more

Take a Breath

It feels aggravating, even rude, to be told, “Take a breath”, “Calm down”, “Chill”! Even so… the request during a heated conversation, in whatever form, is often spot on! We need to calm down.  Our mind’s perception rarely provides a full picture, especially if there’s tension. If we take a moment to quiet ourselves, even … Read more

Knowledge Or Not!

As much as we believe conversation connects us, sometimes our knowledge gets us in trouble!  Let me explain! At a community table recently, a couple taught us about how they raised chickens, turkeys and rabbits on their property. We’ve since shared what we learned with others because the “home farming” conversation was interesting and a … Read more

I Don’t Want to Talk About This Right Now

“I don’t want to talk about this right now.” No other sentence stops conversation like this one. The recipient feels unheard. In response we retort: “I can’t move forward with my day (my project, my work, with going to sleep) without having a conversation NOW”.  Are you someone who can wait? Most of us can’t. Perhaps … Read more

The Never Ending Heart to Heart Exchange

Comfort food such as mashed potatoes, gravy and meatloaf reminds me of goodness, a dependable meal of solid kindness. Similarly, a conversation can be packed with goodwill reminiscent of homemade apple pie your sweet grandmother likes to serve. Thoughtful conversation ultimately means taking a “heart to heart” exchange to heart! There’s no beauty greater than … Read more

Changing the “What Gives?”

Sometimes we wonder about insensitive behavior during a conversation. We ask ourselves “What Gives”, what cues are we misunderstanding? A more helpful question, instead, is to consider how to change a discussion’s tone and tenor to something more amiable. In a favorite morning meditation by ”happiness expert” Jonathan Lehmann[1], he offers affirmations to “make it … Read more

Embrace the Dimensions!

Interacting with others is a multi-dimensional experience! On Wednesday night The Beehive Collective, “an all-volunteer swarm of educators, artists, and activists using images to communicate” presented “Mesoamérica Resiste”[1], a large intricate illustration depicting indigenous cultures and over 400 species of insects, animals and plants, resisting global systems. Examining the poster’s details, really studying the myriad … Read more

Finding a Place At The Table

It’s intimidating to enter a room as the new employee or guest when people already know one another. Conversation is buzzing and you look around wondering how to make a graceful entrance. There doesn’t seem to be a place to sit other than at the end of the table! You don’t want to interrupt. “Breaking … Read more

Between Stimulus and Response Pause for Peace

“Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space there is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom. – Viktor Frankl, Austrian neurologist, psychiatrist, Holocaust survivor. As Viktor Frankl reminds us, there is space in the back and forth of a conversation. Often it’s difficult … Read more