What we talk about with others defines the relationship: “The conversation is the relationship.”[1] Does this ring true for you? How we show up in our exchanges determines whether some sort of kinship develops or continues to grow. “Showing Up” means demonstrating a willingness to be honest, kind, and authentic with whomever you share your space. … Read more
This past week Obama and Trump met for the first time. What? How could that be? They had never met before? No wonder their meeting lasted ninety minutes. Until this first rendezvous, information about each other was based on generalities, negative stereotypes and “knowledge” sourced from other people’s opinions. Although the recent campaign rhetoric pains … Read more
Sometimes I wonder about “geeking out” over enabling conversation. My passion has to do with compassion, our ability, regardless of circumstances, to deeply connect with others. Compassion is beautiful to witness and at the recent TEDxMileHigh Conversation Café` great empathy was present! It wasn’t that The Conversation Café was a “cry fest”. The empathy I … Read more
In the award-winning novel, A Little Life, by Hanya Yanagihara, two characters and dear friends, Willem and Jude, inspired me by their ability to conduct difficult conversations yet still maintain a strong love for one another. Jude, a victim of sexual assault, continually cuts himself as a way to pacify pain. Struggling to understand this … Read more
Whether for work or play, hosting a mealtime get-together is the same: an adventure, with guests to enjoy and get to know, at a restaurant or in our own backyard. Let’s go! Go local! Pick a date. Invite guests. Decide the menu. Set a table. Enjoy a cocktail. Here’s how to launch! The Guests: Think … Read more
Have you ever gone to a gathering, surrounded by chatty guests, yet felt inexplicably alone? Although the room is full of happy people, conversations lag and you find it difficult to know what to say next. What has happened? Sometimes we lose our sense of wonder and appreciation for the gifts right in front of … Read more
As much as I treasure a delicious meal to host a gathering at home offers benefits beyond the food, gifts often overlooked. If work requires gathering at a restaurant, the same applies: bringing people together provides promises beyond what’s served on the plate. Even serving a favorite, boxed macaroni is fine if we’re enthused about … Read more
It hasn’t always been this way…that we could “Google map” the nearest coffee shop and quickly identify where to find our morning liquid gold. Only recently has coffee become readily available. In an interview with Phil Goodlaxson, owner of Corvus Coffee, he reminded me that coffee houses historically have been a place for political discussions, … Read more
At the time, my friend kept telling me, “Go out for a glass of wine, even coffee, so that you can have some space for conversation.” Although I didn’t listen, looking back all these years later, she was right: I should have talked about the “tough stuff” with my manager and co-worker. When conversations don’t … Read more
The minister doesn’t need to know that sometimes I create invite lists on the church program while listening to the sermon. When I’m sitting in a quiet place, a plethora of names pops into my mind. I “day dream” about engaged conversation around the table with a few or many friends. Although I’m constantly organizing … Read more